Standing on my Soap Box

I’m separated.

There! I said it. Judge away!

What’s even worse, is that I initiated it. Yes, I asked him to leave, and I kept the boys that live in the house with me. “What kind of a Christian are you? I don’t mean to judge your relationship with Christ, but…” “What about your vows?” “You made them before God!”

I’ve heard all the above. The last two I actually said to myself. If you are a Christian that has separated/divorced, I’ve also said the same thing to you in my head. I am sorry.

Are you done judging me? Are you ready to hear my story? Before I go any further, though, I am going to state right from the “get-go”, I am not here to bash my husband. My husband is a great person. We just have some issues that I can not/will not get past. You don’t need to know details. I love him, and 24 years ago I intended to keep my vows. This was never my plan.

There are a few things though that you do need to know. 1) I spoke to two different pastors (the one that married us, as well as our current pastor). They both said I needed to speak to a Christian counsellor. 2) I did, in fact, speak to a wonderful, understanding, and encouraging Christian counsellor, who stated that marriage was important to them, however I needed to separate.

I am not blaming my counsellor for my decision. I am not making the counsellor my scape goat. I knew I needed to put some distance between my husband and I a while ago. I just needed the counsel to know that I was ok to move forward. The counsellor told me a few things. 1) God spoke of divorce with regards to his relationship with the Israelites. 2) Sometimes Christians do things that go against what God says, but they are still within the will of God based on their circumstances. Rahab lied about the men she was hiding and was still accounted as a woman of faith in Hebrews.

Do I know where this is going? Kind of, but not completely. I do believe that God is a God of healing and am willing to allow him to do the major healing that is needed. That part is out of my hands, so for now I will live one day at a time as He sees fit.

So, why am I sharing this? Because I have a blog, and I can. Also, because I want to encourage people, who may go through similar things, and I don’t beat around the bush. Lastly, I am changing back to my maiden name soon, and don’t want people to have the ability to guess what is going on.